Finding Purpose

As a military spouse, it’s challenging to find purpose in our lives when our lives are constantly changing, right? Corie Weathers has shared a great article on this subject on our website. Check it out here!

Ever have a bad day? Do you tire of the people who tell you to just get over it? Christine Kane shares some thoughtful insight on how to get yourself through it…read more in our blog http://wings4women.org/?p=342


Life Outside the Gate

What happens when your military kids grow up? Check out this article by a military brat who knows! She writes, “Take heart—it’s not as bad as you think. I’m a military kid but I’m all grown up now. And I survived. So let me change your thinking for a minute…” Go to post at Wings4Women.org


Surviving Military Wife Life

by Melissa Petrone

looking on a map

When I said, “I do” to my husband and joined the military too (as his spouse), I thought… “I can do this …it won’t be so hard…it will be an adventure!”  After all, I lived on my own for many years, had my career and knew that I was a strong person…This will be easy. Well, I was wrong. On so many levels. Military life and the life of a military spouse is many things but EASY…? No definitely not easy. It is probably one of the most challenging callings I have ever had. Yes…I feel God calls many women (and men) to be a military spouse. I although did not know this at the time when I married my husband. Heck, I was just so happy to finally find a husband…but that is another story.

Let me tell you a little about myself and my family. I am now 42 and living in Fountain, CO. Ft. Carson was our last duty station (and our last deployment) before my husband decided to retire from the US Army after 25 years of service (we have been together for 11 years). We decided to settle in Colorado with our family of 3 children ages 18, 7 and 4, and our dogs.

My journey as an Army wife started in Ft. Belvoir, VA. We were there for about 1 ½ before my very first PCS (Permanent Change of Station) to Baumholder, Germany.  I had no clue how a PCS went but I survived it, and as all military spouse are I became an expert. My first year in Baumholder…well…for a lack of better words…STUNK!! I was homesick, culture shocked, with no friends and my husband was never around. It seemed as soon as our plane landed he was fast at work and I was left to do the rest. I also had my step-son who was nine at the time..for more please visit our new website and blog at wings4women.org

Ugh! Tax time is quickly looming before us. But luckily, as military members and families, we are not left out in the cold to figure it out by ourselves. Military 1 Source and other resources are available to keep you from pulling your hair out! Check out my post on our new website, Wings4Women.org

Cynthia Nimerichter was a Keynote Speaker at our 2010 Colorado Conference. She reminded us all about living graciously and having a delicious life. The following thoughts on 2011 was in her newsletter this month and she has graciously allowed me to share it with you. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! Alane

As 2011 arrives …

I am obsessed with making New Year’s resolutions. There is something about a fresh start, a new beginning, which appeals to me.
And yet I would be embarrassed to tell you how often I fail to keep my promises to myself. In fact, I can only think of a couple of resolutions that I have kept! see more at our new website Wings4Women.org

Be sure to check out our new website/blog for tips on letting go of the Holiday SHOULDs and embrace the joy of the season! Wings4Women.org/blog  Go Now

The following is an excerpt from Michelle Cuthrell’s book, Behind the Blue Star Banner, it resonated with me and I thought it was a good time of year to share this. Michelle’s book has really opened my eyes to see the bigger picture; not just the trials I am having, but the reason why my husband serves his country and what it really means. When we can look at our lives through the eyes of our spouse, it helps us build a better marriage. Thank you Michelle for letting me share this!


From Until they Come Home | October 21, 2005 | by Michelle Cuthrell

Being a military wife isn’t easy. No, I’m not on the battlefield, and no, I’m not the one facing the fire. Those are true heroes. But I do take some of the shots. I sacrifice, too. While my husband faces the attacks of insurgents and the casualties of war, I face attacks of depression and the casualties of worry and stress. It’s not just a long-distance relationship I have to hold together anymore; it’s my sanity. And that task has never been harder. …It’s a lot for one person to handle. And it’s sometimes difficult to hold my tongue and be supporting when the only thing I want, the only thing I ask for, is to be a normal family–together in the same place for more than six months at one time. It doesn’t seem like that should be asking too much. And yet, when it comes to service our country, I’m starting to realize that it has to be. Although I complain about holidays alone and long, lonely nights, I quickly forget that my husband endures those things, too–only read more

My mom is here for a visit. I love it when she comes because we get to catch up, play cribbage, have tea and go for a massage. Oh, and there is all the shopping, too. Special things that I do just with her. I love it.

Her visit got me to thinking this morning. For me, the toughest part of being a military family is being away from my extended family. There is something about the presence of cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. For me, even if it isn’t always good, my family is always there, always loves me (even when they “hate” me) and always makes sure I’m doing okay. That is a good, safe feeling.

The sense of family is important–it is grounding and safe. Family allows you to be you, to make mistakes and recover. Family loves unconditionally. These things are vital for a healthy, balanced life. Especially in the military.

How can we create that sense of family when our relatives are far away? This is something I’ve been talking to a lot of people about as we try to determine the best path for Wings to take. Here are some of the things I’ve come up with so far:

  • Make a point to have dinner as a family (at the table without the TV) most nights of the week to create strong immediate family bonds
  • Find someone in your community who can give you a “sister” kind of friendship–non-judgemental, encouraging, caring, unconditional love
  • Find a mentor who can give you that “motherly” advice because she has been there and knows
  • Be gentle, kind, non-judgemental and forgiving towards the military spouses around you a kind word and some forgiveness go a long way

I’d love to hear what kind of ideas you have for creating a sense of family with those who are around you. Please comment below.

Check it Out!

We have a new website and we’ve integrated a blog on our new site! So if you have been receiving a feed from this site, please update your feed reader to link to our new site at Wings4Women.org

Take a look around! We’ve integrated much of what is on this site PLUS MORE!!

Looking forward to reconnecting!

Alane Pearce
Founder and Director
Wings for Women Military Spouse Conferences
a nonprofit organization for military spouses by military spouses